Remember to say NO sometimes.
Life’s still too complex for this to work.
Though 2016 has been a shit year for people who share my views, it’s otherwise treated me personally pretty well. Here reprising an ancient tradition.
What did you do in 2016 that you'd never done before?
Got appointed to a professorship. Visited Georgia and South Africa. Taught at the EGG. Became a National Trust member.
Did you keep your New Years' resolutions?
N/A.
Have you any resolutions for next year?
Read more classic fiction, watch more classic movies, listen to more classic(al) music.
Did anyone close to you give birth?
Will Harwood and Lobke Aelbrecht, and also Jen Feroze.
Did anyone close to you die?
My Uncle Michael.
What countries did you visit?
Belgium, China, Georgia, Germany, the Netherlands, Norway, South Africa, Switzerland. Also Qatar, Turkey and the UAE, if you count airports.
What would you like to have in 2017 that you lacked in 2016?
I said this last year too, but: someone to share more of my life with.
What date(s) from 2016 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
23rd June, for all the wrong reasons.
What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting offered the job in Konstanz.
What was your biggest failure?
Getting miserable and grumpy for no real reason in late August and early September, and taking it out on people I valued.
Did you suffer illness or injury?
Only occasional swollen glands, and a bit of heatstroke while in Georgia.
What was the best thing you bought?
Various travel tickets.
Whose behaviour merited celebration?
My PhD student Henri, and several new colleagues in Manchester: Lauren, Andrea, Patrycja. Also the awesome Knott Bar quiz team.
Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
One of my students. A colleague in the Exams Office. Also, various racists and imbeciles in the UK and the US.
Where did most of your money go?
Travelling.
What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Starting a new life in Germany in 2017. Visiting Georgia. Playing HeroQuest.
What songs will always remind you of 2016?
Discard Your Fear - Riverside (also other songs from the sublime album Love, Fear and the Time Machine)
Compared to this time last year, are you:
Happier or sadder? Happier.
Thinner or fatter? Fatter.
Richer or poorer? About the same.
What do you wish you'd done more of?
Cultural stuff.
What was the most embarrassing thing that happened to you in 2016?
See above (“failure”).
Who did you meet for the first time?
Lauren, Andrea, David, Ben, Xiaofang, Ollie, and many others - apologies to anyone I’ve left out. Also got to know Rachel Fritts properly for the first time.
Did you fall in love in 2016?
No.
How many people did you kiss?
None.
How many one-night stands did you have?
None. (Answering this question is getting boring.)
What was your favourite TV programme?
Orphan Black - a full rewatch and series 4. Catching up on Game of Thrones was also a lot of fun.
What was your favourite film of this year?
Jane Wants A Boyfriend. Arrival was good, if you ignored most of the linguistics. Jason Bourne was also a lot of fun.
What was the best book you read in 2016?
Starborn by Lucy Hounsom and Long Way to a Small Angry Planet by Becky Chambers are both strong contenders. The prize has to go to City of Stairs by Robert Jackson Bennett, though.
What was your greatest musical discovery?
N/A.
How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2016?
Long hair and a hat.
What kept you sane?
There’s a presupposition failure here. But Michael and Rachel have been useful for that in the latter part of the year. In addition, the quiz team, and PKB coffee.
What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
31. Visited the Isle of Man with David and Fiona Thomas.
How did you spend Christmas?
With the family, as usual.
What would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Two crucial winner-takes-all elections going the other way.
Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Alicia Vikander was damn cute in the Bourne film.
What political issue stirred you the most?
Brexit.
Who did you miss?
Many people.
Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Yes, at least one.
Was 2016 a good year for you?
On a personal level, yes, despite global setbacks.
What was your favourite moment of the year?
Looking out from the summit of Snaefell with David and Fiona. Also had lots of good times with Misa and on National Trust outings during the second half of the year, and the beautiful wedding of Mia and Joey Grigg was a high point. It was really nice to catch up with Neil, Elena and Polina and drink inadvisable quantities of alcohol like in the good old days.
What is a valuable life lesson you learned in 2016?
There are people it’s really not worth bothering with.
What quote can be used to sum up your year?
Life’s really too complex for this to work.
After a hiatus of three years, I feel it’s time to be self-indulgent again.
What did you do in 2015 that you'd never done before?
Went to Iceland and China. Rode a horse. Flew on a Boeing 747. Had research leave. Briefly led a political party. Got a bunch of joint-authored stuff finished or published (thanks, guys).
Did you keep your New Years' resolutions?
Well, I wanted to lose some weight, and forcing myself to pay for a personal trainer has caused me to go some way towards that end. Admittedly it’s hard to write that now given the last two months, though.
Have you any resolutions for next year?
No.
Did anyone close to you give birth?
Latifa Sadoc and Iñaki Al Dana had a beautiful baby girl who I had the pleasure of meeting in Brussels. All the best to them!
Did anyone close to you die?
Not this year, fortunately.
What countries did you visit?
Belgium, China, France, Germany, Iceland, Italy, the Netherlands, Norway.
What would you like to have in 2016 that you lacked in 2015?
A girlfriend, probably. I’m getting lonely in my old age.
What date(s) from 2015 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
23rd May. Turning 30 and touring Iceland with Thomas and Thomas was awesome.
What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting over my fear of flying. Finishing my Old Saxon corpus (http://www.chlg.ac.uk/helipad/) comes a pretty close second, though.
What was your biggest failure?
Not being able to let go of someone from my past. Also, missing out on the Forbidden City by literally ten seconds. I may never get the opportunity again.
Did you suffer illness or injury?
Just a cold or two, fortunately.
What was the best thing you bought?
The new iPad.
Whose behaviour merited celebration?
Misa and Julia got good jobs, and Laura and Misa passed their vivas with flying colours
Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
The assholes responsible for torpedoing IT Services at Manchester on ideological grounds. Also, a certain Mont Follick applicant.
Where did most of your money go?
Trains and training.
What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Iceland and China. (See photos.)
What songs will always remind you of 2015?
Heroes For Ghosts - The Gathering
Enter Sandman - Stumbleine
Vanilla - Ghost Maps
Compared to this time last year, are you:
Happier or sadder? Happier.
Thinner or fatter? Thinner.
Richer or poorer? Richer.
What do you wish you'd done more of?
Spending time with friends. I said this in 2011 and 2012 and am saying it again.
What was the most embarrassing thing that happened to you in 2016?
See above (“failure”).
Who did you meet for the first time?
Not so many people this year.
Did you fall in love in 2015?
No.
How many people did you kiss?
None.
How many one-night stands did you have?
None.
What was your favourite TV programme?
Not much of a TV year. Orphan Black has been a lot of fun, though. Was that this year?
What was your favourite film of this year?
Not much of a film year either. Really enjoyed the new Star Wars.
What was the best book you read in 2015?
The new Peter F. Hamilton was a great romp.
What was your greatest musical discovery?
Ghost Maps and The Gathering.
How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2015?
Er...
What kept you sane?
Julia intervened at an opportune moment, and the Thomases are always good for that too.
What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
See above!
How did you spend Christmas?
With the family.
What would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A better showing for the Pirates in the 2015 general election.
Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
This is not how I roll.
What political issue stirred you the most?
Prevent.
Who did you miss?
Alastair, Fiona, David, Latifa, Iñaki, Danielle.
Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I don’t think so.
Was 2015 a good year for you?
Definitely, despite a very frantic autumn.
What was your favourite moment of the year?
Getting to the Great Wall - and everything that led up to it.
What is a valuable life lesson you learned in 2015?
Sometimes you just need to wait.
What quote can be used to sum up your year?
No quote. This is facile.
Review of 2012
I did this last year, and feel it deserves doing again.
What did you do in 2012 that you'd never done before?
Earned taxable income. Got a doctorate. Had my first article published in a peer-reviewed academic journal. Published the first article in my own peer-reviewed academic journal. Went to a friend's wedding. Put in an offer to buy a flat.
Did you keep your New Years' resolutions?
Well, the only pseudo-resolution I made was not to fly anywhere. And I kept that one, despite embarking on trips to Granada, Lisbon, Oslo, Stockholm and Zürich, among others. Train travel is so, so much better than flying.
Have you any resolutions for next year?
I'll be trying to get fit again, after a lazy 2012. I've signed up for a year's gym membership and plan on getting my money's worth. I also want to fix my body clock.
Did anyone close to you give birth?
I don't think so.
Did anyone close to you die?
No.
What countries did you visit?
Belgium, Denmark, France, Germany, Luxembourg (passing through), Norway, Portugal, Spain, Sweden and Switzerland.
What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?
Washboard abs. (I said this last year, but I really mean it this year...)
What date(s) from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
25th December. Boring, maybe, but it was one of the most peaceful, harmonious Christmases with the family that I can remember.
What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Successfully applying for a permanent position at Manchester. (Though in any other year, having my thesis passed with no corrections would win.)
What was your biggest failure?
Trying to pack too much in to August/September. Fun, but I should have focused on getting ready for teaching. Only just recovering from the backlog now.
Did you suffer illness or injury?
I had a nasty virus with tickly cough which put me out of action for a few days in November. And was diagnosed with keratoconus, though that has yet to impact my quality of life.
What was the best thing you bought?
Skyrim. (Closely followed by the TV and XBox I use to play Skyrim.)
Whose behaviour merited celebration?
Tif & Iñaki got married. Jen got engaged. My new Manchester allies Danielle, Laura and Rebecca organised a great conference.
Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
The Tories, again. Also various people responsible for some of the more ridiculous higher-level admin decisions at Manchester, e.g. the ones relating to.attendance monitoring.
Where did most of your money go?
Traaaaaains. (Yes, I'm a zombie who has a problem with voiced bilabial consonants in initial position.)
What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Skyrim. Tif & Iñaki's wedding. Teaching a new course on Historical Syntax that I designed myself. Buying a flat.
What songs will always remind you of 2012?
Pale Criminal - The Reasoning
Carnival Song - Midas Fall
Eye of the Sparrow - Jim Lehrer ft. Mitt Romney & Barack Obama (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QlwilbVYvUg)
Compared to this time last year, are you:
Happier or sadder? About the same.
Thinner or fatter? Fatter.
Richer or poorer? Richer.
What do you wish you'd done more of?
Spending time with friends. And the fact that I said this last year and am saying it again now is not a good thing.
What was the most embarrassing thing that happened to you in 2012?
Oh, nothing too bad. Probably messing up my timing slightly at ICEHL.
Who did you meet for the first time?
So many nice people in Manchester, many of whom have become firm friends. Danielle, James, Laura, Julia, Maciej, Tine, Laurel, Wendell, and more. Also nice people at conferences: Richard Zimmermann, Carolina Silva, and others. I don't deserve all you nice people.
Did you fall in love in 2012?
Not really.
How many people did you kiss?
None.
How many one-night stands did you have?
None.
What was your favourite TV programme?
Game of Thrones again. Also enjoying Battlestar Galactica.
What was your favourite film of this year?
Probably The Dark Knight Rises.
What was the best book you read in 2012?
I've read very little this year. Does it make me a pleb if I say The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo? If so, I'll say Sociolinguistic Typology: Social Determinants of Linguistic Complexity, by Peter Trudgill. ;) I also really enjoyed the latest Song of Ice and Fire book.
What was your greatest musical discovery?
Not much music either this year. I'll go with The Reasoning.
How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2012?
"Try to wear clothes that aren't falling to pieces."
What kept you sane?
Yuni and Danielle. Seriously. Thanks, guys.
What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was in Cambridge, and had quite a quiet one: met Elena for lunch, and went to a syntax talk. I was 27.
How did you spend Christmas?
With the family.
What would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Expediting some of the damn publications that have been in the publishing pipeline since at least 2011 and are still there.
Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
No one. Though Jenna-Louise Coleman is pretty cute and could win my heart as new Dr Who companion.
What political issue stirred you the most?
I'm pretty peeved about the general reactions to the Finch report. But other than that, same old: cuts to welfare, and tuition fees.
Who did you miss?
Everyone in Cambridge.
Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Yes.
Was 2012 a good year for you?
It'd be hard for any year to top 2011 for me, but 2012 comes close.
What was your favourite moment of the year?
Dinner after PhD graduation with family and friends? Cruising back from Granada, Gran Clase, with Duff? Exploring Lisbon's bars with Lieven, Carolina and Moreno? Looking down over Stuttgart from the burial chapel? Too many candidates, once again.
What is a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012?
Opportunities are everywhere. But don't take all of them.
What quote can be used to sum up your year?
"I'm not a robot, okay? I wish. Then I could go higher, and you could rotate my arm and send me whooshing into space." - Mitt Romney (sort of)
Review of 2011
A bit late, I suppose, but I spotted this and couldn't resist, as 2011 has been something of a special year for me.
What did you do in 2011 that you'd never done before?
Went outside Europe for the first time - twice! Tried (and failed) to prevent Lord Sainsbury from becoming Chancellor of the University of Cambridge. Founded an academic journal. Held a lizard. Got my manbag stolen, inc. passport and camera. Created my own variety of Ritter Sport. Oh, and got a proper job.
Did you keep your New Years' resolutions?
I don't recall making any. So if I did, I presumably didn't keep them, except maybe by accident.
Have you any resolutions for next year?
No.
Did anyone close to you give birth?
Two linguisticians to whom I owe a great deal academically: Theresa Biberauer and Anne Breitbarth. Best of luck to Josef and Maira respectively, as they make their ways in the world. (And to the lucky parents, I wish a speedy return to ordinary sleeping patterns.)
Did anyone close to you die?
No.
What countries did you visit?
Belgium (loads of times! - started the year in Brussels with Tif and Iñaki), France, Germany, Hungary, Italy (if Rome Fiumicino Airport counts), Japan, Norway, Romania and the USA.
What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
Washboard abs.
What date(s) from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
12th December: got up at 5:30am, ate some suspiciously mulled-wine-flavoured porridge, got on a train to Manchester, gave a presentation which I thought went really well, did an interview which I thought went really badly, got to know Andrew Koontz-Garboden and Yuni Kim a little better, got on the train back, resigned myself to not having got the job, was phoned and offered the job, got back to Cambridge and went out for a few drinks with Tim B., Alison and Iain. Long day. Worth it.
What was your biggest achievement of the year?
See above! Also getting a paper accepted into Diachronica ranks pretty highly.
What was your biggest failure?
Going into stroppy toddler mode after having my bag stolen. (Sorry, Fi & David.)
Did you suffer illness or injury?
Panic disorder still flares up every now and then. Other than that, just the occasional bout of man-flu.
What was the best thing you bought?
The game Dragon Age 2. Also, 100g bags of Mini Eggs (repeatedly).
Whose behaviour merited celebration?
Lots of people. Alastair A., Elliott, and Daves Woods and Davies got jobs in academia, for a start. Sam M. made a surprise visit to my birthday party. Jared became a Song of Ice & Fire devotee (w00t).
Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
The Tories, mostly. But a list of others, too: the English Defence League; Dunn et al. in their paper in Nature (2011); Andrew Brown; Cedric Boeckx; the people who voted for Sainsbury (though not Lord S. himself); for-profit academic publishers; and more besides.
Where did most of your money go?
Visits to conferences I probably didn't need to attend and couldn't get the University to fully fund.
What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Um, new job? Also the possibilities, and lifestyle, afforded by academia in general. And going on a beautiful, beautiful trip to Romania by train. Japan was pretty frickin' cool too. Not to mention the cheese fondue with Team Belgium.
What songs will always remind you of 2011?
17 - Midas Fall
but also
Do You Know What You Are Saying? - Gazpacho
Jesus Christ - Brand New
Release - Afro Celt Sound System
Time Flies - Porcupine Tree
F**k Everything - Jon Lajoie (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ulIOrQasR18)
Emergence of the Unmarked - Honkies with Attitude (http://ling.auf.net/lingBuzz/001396)
Compared to this time last year, are you:
Happier or sadder? Happier, a little bit.
Thinner or fatter? Probably about the same.
Richer or poorer? Probably about the same.
What do you wish you'd done more of?
Spending time with friends old and new.
What was the most embarrassing thing that happened to you in 2011?
Stroppy toddler incident (see above).
Who did you meet for the first time?
Lots of people... new housemates, new coursemates, colleagues, and more. The cast and crew of Die Hochzeit. Was particularly nice to meet Mirjam Z. this autumn - hope you'll get a chance to return to Cambridge at some point! And Jenneke van der Wal - our overlap in Cambridge was/is all too brief. Thanks also to the pleasant pizza-providing Perrys.
Did you fall in love in 2011?
No. (Which may be a first in itself.)
How many people did you kiss?
None.
How many one-night stands did you have?
None.
What was your favourite TV programme?
This year? Game of Thrones.
What was your favourite film of this year?
Let Me In. (Though that may in fact be the only film I watched this year, except the films that I watched on intercontinental flights, which don't count.)
What was the best book you read in 2011?
A re-read of the Otherland series by Tad Williams convinced me that they were still awesome. And I really enjoyed Jane Eyre.
What was your greatest musical discovery?
Did I discover Midas Fall in 2011? If not, then probably Marillion.
How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
Beard.
What kept you sane?
The knowledge that there are plenty of people out there who give a shit about what I'm doing. (Thanks to everyone who liked one of my statuses, especially the one about the new job!)
What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
A picnic next to the Millpond, opposite the Granta. Alastair A. baked a magnificent cake, and I broke my strict dietary regime of that time in order to have a piece. I was 26.
How did you spend Christmas?
With the family.
What would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A solid gold house.
Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
None, really.
What political issue stirred you the most?
Cuts to social services and to higher education (I reckon I'm allowed two, because they're both part of the same twattish Tory agenda). "No amount of cajolery, and no attempts at ethical or social seduction, can eradicate from my heart a deep burning hatred of the Tory party. So far as I am concerned, they are lower than vermin." (Nye Bevan. Thanks to Neil Myler for this quotation.)
Who did you miss?
My friends from the good old (school) days). Jen W. (In France, bof.) Lynsey B.
Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Yes; this time last year I thought that David Cameron was a tool. Now I think worse of him.
Was 2011 a good year for you?
Probably the best in recent memory.
What was your favourite moment of the year?
So many candidates... though walking in the Ardennes and posing riddles to Team Belgium was right up there. Also, sitting in the sun at the international cafe in Sighisoara town square and eating muffins with Fi and David.
What is a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011?
"Málróf er gefið mörgum, en spekin fám." - The First Grammarian
What quote can be used to sum up your year?
"I have always thought of Oxford and Cambridge as networks of pubs with a superstructure of colleges." (Lass 2009: 178)
